Big Fat Stupid Doctors.

This is an important post. I am very angry in it.

I am transgendered. To transition from female to male in my city I need to go through a gender clinic. I have no choice. There is only one clinic. I cannot go anywhere else.

This clinic is bigoted in ways that would astound you.

I have been told (to my face) that I need to lose weight before I will be allowed to transition - and when I explained that I cannot exercise I was told that I can "take pills for it nowadays". I have been told (to my face) that I should wait until my chronic illness that I have had for ten years gets better before I transition.

I've also been scowled at, looked down upon and scoffed at for being bisexual, polyamorous, and unemployed (even though, you know, I AM DISABLED.)

All this is coming from medical professionals, ladies gents and others. These people control my health. These people get to decide whether or not I get to have medical treatments that will save my life (in this case by stopping me comitting suicide).

I am being denied medical treatment.

Let me repeat that, in case you missed it: I AM BEING DENIED MEDICAL TREATMENT.

So I cried, I got angry, and I realized that complaining won't help with this particular lot (people have gone that route before and not gotten anywhere). I will have to jump through their hoops.

So I go to the doctor. I tell him what the problem is. I tell him that I need to lose weight in order to receive medical treatment. I tell him why I cannot lose weight the "normal" way - I already eat well and I cannot exercise due to that whole disability thing.

He spends 20 minutes telling me that I am disgustingly overweight and it's all my fault. Oh, and by the way, I'm not really disabled - I'm just fat. And that whole thing where I can't walk? The cure for that is to walk, apparently!

After many tears we finally get to the point where he might be able to help me. He prescribes me a drug. I am the first patient in his career he has ever prescribed it to.

It is Duromine. A legal version of speed. An amphetamine.

It is not a safe drug to take. It does awful things to my body, and it can be addictive and easy to abuse. I don't want to take the drug. But I have to. What are my other choices? I have none.

I have to do this if I want medical treatment. You see, as it stands, I am not a real human being. I do not have human rights. I do not have the right to medical treatment right now. Because I am fat, mostly. But also because I am transgendered, and because I am disabled.

I do not have human rights.

Let's recap this little tale of joy:

* Cannot transition until I lose weight.
* Potentially cannot transition until my disability is "better", whatever that means.
* Cannot lose weight due to disability.
* Told to lose weight regardless of disabiliity.
* Given a potentially harmful drug to make me lose weight.

* If I cannot transition, I may be a danger to myself.
* Denial of treatment for transgenderedism may lead to my death.

In short, these people are okay with their poor or lack of treatment leading to my death.

Because I am not human. I do not have human rights.

I am a fat, transgendered, disabled person. No, not a person. I am not a person. I do not have rights like people do. I do not have the right to quality of life, to good and caring medical treatment.

Because I am fat, transgendered, and disabled, all in one neat package. I am not human.